give in their name, heal in your own

the surprising way giving tuesday can honor your person and maybe just soften the ache some

Grief creates an overflow. An overflow of tenderness, love, memories, devotion and fill in your blank here __________. I find that directing even a small piece of that toward a cause or community can feel incredibly grounding as we sit alongside our grief.

It can also restore a sense of agency. Loss can take so much of what feels like it is in our control away. It comes uninvited and only the way we choose to meet it can feel like we have a sense of autonomy. Making a choice to give, in any amount and in any direction, can remind you that you still have the ability to make impact, to shape something in your world, however big or small.

Giving reconnects you to community at a time when grief can feel lonely or isolating. It opens the door a crack, back into humanity, reminding you that you’re still part of something larger, even if you’re moving slowly, hesitantly or tenderly.

It can be a beautiful way to honor your person, too. Supporting a cause that reflects their values or spirit can feel like continuing their story, carrying forward something they cared about when you’re not sure how to carry yourself.

Sometimes giving simply brings a sense of meaning and mattering into a season that can feel disorienting. A single generous act that is measured by intention, not size, can offer a moment to feel on purpose and remind you that your heart is still capable of moving toward good, even in the midst of the ache.

You may have a charity or community that feels near and dear to you. The Alzheimer’s Foundation became close to my heart when we learned to live alongside my Dad’s memory loss. When I give in his honor, I feel like I can help a family and future be different.

I will share a few from my heart to yours.

Beyond Type 1: Co-founded by Nick Jonas, this is a nonprofit changing what it means to live with diabetes. Through platforms, programs, resources and grants uniting the type 1 global diabetes community.

Believe in Tomorrow Children’s Foundation: A respite housing service to support critically ill children and their families.

House of Shan: A curated collection of accessories designed to empower and give back. Each month supports a different charity.

The Greenhouse : A retreat home being built to support families who experience child loss as they navigate grief.

The Dougie Center: Vital grief support and rescuers at no cost to children and families.

The Loveland Foundation: Covers the cost of therapy for black woman and non-binary individuals. Privates mental health services and invests in the professional development of BIPOC therapists.

Please, feel free to add one that feels close to you in the comments.

Giving in Grief and why it feels right to me today…

• It offers a place to put the love:

Grief is so often love with nowhere to go. Giving lets some of that love move outward again.

+It restores a sense of agency.

Loss takes away choice. Contributing, even something small, reminds you that you can still make impact.

+It reconnects you to community.

Grief isolates. Giving draws you back toward others in a way that feels gentle and doable.

+It honors your person.

Choosing a cause in their name can feel like continuing their story, and keeping their values in motion.

+It brings meaning into a season that may feel different for you this year.

A simple act of generosity can offer a moment of purpose when everything else feels unmoored.

+It lets you practice being part of the world again.

Please feel free to share a foundation or charity near and dear to you in the comments.

x, Barri